Something very important to me died yesterday. Not literally, but it sure feels like it. I was engaged to a man I had been with for over three years and we were set to be married on July 1st of this year. At this last hour he decided that he needs to be on his own. Talk about heartbreak!
Yesterday I was a mess. I cried most of the day, but most importantly I prayed. I didn’t pray for my relationship to be repaired, if that’s meant to happen, God will make it happen and I won’t hope in something that may not happen. Instead, I prayed for him. I prayed that whatever he’s going through would come to pass and that he could one day be happy. I pray that his anger would be replaced with the peace of God and that he’d find solace in his Savior.
I can’t even imagine what this would have done to me 15 years ago, before I knew Christ. I am just glad that I’m no longer the person I was then, otherwise I might still be struggling through the ordeal. Today I’m experiencing the peace that surpasses all understanding that Paul talks about in Corinthians. Even though I don’t know what the future holds, I’m okay and I can totally feel God’s presence. He’s changed me so much that life is no longer chaotic, even when terrible things happen. I’m so grateful for Him!
Have you ever tried to look for something in the dark? It’s hard, isn’t it? That’s what it’s like before Salvation. Once you commit yourself to the LORD, when darkness falls upon you, It’s not as difficult to see Him. He’s right there. If you need help getting yourself up off the ground, He lifts you up with His righteous right hand. If your heart is broken and you feel like the world is crashing on you, He’s right there with Heaven in tow.
God’s grace gives us life in abundance, so forgive others immediately, love God and your neighbor, and bask in the glory of the Father’s presence. You are so loved and so wanted. You’re never alone and I want to encourage you to never stop seeking His face. He’s beautiful and He created you in His image. Be blessed, my friend. Love you!
**UPDATE: As of now, Brian and I are committed to our relationship and are working to strengthen our relationship with guidance from our Father.**